I don't know what clicked, but something happened to me the other night when I left my friend's house and headed home. We had just finished watching the movie 21 with Kate Bosworth and Jim Sturgess. I know it was just a movie but the character development in that film got me thinking about my own life and experiences. I realized that my journey to become Alex "High Roller" Ford is not unlike the protagonist of 21. He starts off so meek, nervous, and underconfident. He tries so hard just to fit in and always seems to come up short. Then, as the movie progresses his character opens up and opportunities present themselves to him.
I can sum up my life over the past few days they way Sturgess sums up his experience making it big in Vegas. "For the first time in my life the world was making itself easy for me."
I don't know how else to describe it. The feeling of overwhelming confidence in myself is something I have never experienced in this way. Having the knowledge that I can overcome ANY obstacle is priceless! I slipped on my diet a bit yesterday, but it was amazing! Instead of beating myself up over my mistake I smiled at myself in the mirror and forgave myself. I forgave myself! That was something I have never done before. It's also the reason why I am in such a great mood today.
I have accomplished many of my momentum activities and conquered another choice process. Today brought on the desire for another momentum activity though. I remember last year when I began my journey of self-improvement, the things I had to overcome. One of those things was getting over the pushiness of other people. I had to overcome the opinions of others and live for myself. It was only when I was able to love myself for me that I was able to share it with others. The problem comes in sharing too much. It is easy to forget that while I have come a long way in my life, not everybody wants to Hear about it.
It's so tempting to share what I've learned with anyone that comes to me with a problem that I know could solve it by undergoing the same things I have with Outlook Development. I have to remember that everyone's journey is different and they will travel it in their own time and on their own terms.
- Alex
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